The Flow of Life, Dementors,
and Emotional Overdrafts
Why It's Important to Mind Your Resources,
How to Refill Them, and How to Spot the Leaks
I often talk about resources — with friends, students, colleagues. Because no matter how overused this word is on the internet, the concept is still key. We need resources not just to handle complex life experiences, but also for happiness. Have you ever felt so happy that you ended up feeling exhausted? Then you'll get what I mean. Without that vital resource, there won't be any success or satisfaction (not now and not later).

There's no separate «work resource» or «socializing resource» or «children quality time resource» or any other type of resource. It's one and the same for everything: the good and the bad, work and personal life, obligations and spontaneity. If the resource you have is being used up by active processes, there might not be any left for what you've planned.
important
Resources also fuel our creativity. We can work (with enough professionalism and routine, of course) from almost any state, but for any creative process that's a no-go.
Resource depletion leads to apathy and burnout. Because you need quality rest to build up your resources and kickstart that cycle: rest — tackle tasks with enthusiasm — rest again in time. And repeat the process. Often, we don't notice this «resource drain» in time and keep going as if there's still fuel in the tank. But in reality, it's empty. And the car isn't moving. But you're pushing it. You're sweaty and muttering curses. Not fun at all. But you keep pushing.

And now it seems like, «Well, duh, obviously: you're tired — get some rest! It's common sense!». But in reality, we always stumble into this feeling «Just a little more, I'll push through a bit longer, and then I'll rest for everything and everyone at once». For me, this state is like being in debt: your resource balance is zero, but you keep borrowing against it, sinking further into the red, instead of stopping, being kind to yourself, and giving yourself some time to recover.
me:
So, how can I help myself in this state?
also me:
First off all, I trust myself. If my inner voice has been whispering for a week something like «Go binge-watch Netflix for three days straight without getting out of bed», then — even if I can't afford to do it that long — I take it as a clear signal. Our mind doesn't always directly say «rest». Sometimes it disguises it as «change of activity» or even throws in socially frowned-upon or odd scenarios. It's important to recognize your own signals and listen to what they're telling you.
me:
Anything else?
Me again::
Secondly, I pause more often and ask myself a very simple question:

Why am I doing this? Does it bring me joy?

If the answer is «yes» — awesome! That means I’m in a productive, resourceful, self-replenishing flow. If my answer is «no», then here comes the chilly news: probably I’m engaged in a process (could be physical or mental) that's draining my resources, depleting me. And I need to do something about it (after gathering some strength first so that’s not «running on empty and then collapse»).
It’s crucially important to hunt down resource-sucking dementors that can hide in any area of your working process — from a sticky button on the laptop to nuances in client communication. And you can cast a Patronus on 99% of them (mine, by the way, is Boris-the-Blade from «Snatch»). It's then that creativity unfolds: when your resources flow in the right direction and aren't wasted on dealing with various internal and external conflicts.

Please, find your channels of resource and use them; don't borrow resources from your future self. If you're struggling — seek help where you can get it, it’s okay. Take care!
Made on
Tilda